Daily Archives: March 30, 2011
The tales of my bruised fingers may be regarded as cliché but I’m happy to say that my fingers are in optimum operating pinging, grabbing and writing condition. After a long day at the office I came home on time to watch Nigeria’s friendly against those Masais. A young mallam scored Nigeria’s opener as early as the 3rd minute. Everton’s Anichebe scored the type of goal that Shegs Okoro scores in the Nigerian football comic known as Supa Strikaz. Ike Uche finished the tie off with an angry finish. I called it an angry finish because he slammed the roof of the net with “anger”.
SuperSport offered a wide range of matches to choose from.
I started with the France-Croatia friendly. I saw Nasri wearing a very fine white horizontally striped jersey but there was no armband on his left hand. That pissed me off a bit so I tuned to the channel that was showing the England-Ghana game. 33AsaGyan was in the thick of things in the match being a handful for the England defense. England’s goal was made in Birmingham and was finished in Liverpool.
Young and Downing linked up well to tee WWE’s Edge who in turn blasted a low drive past Blackpool’s Kingson. When the ref blew the halftime whistle, I tuned to the channel showing the match between the Netherlands and Hungary. I was in a slight trance when I saw the scoreline at that exact point in time. Netherlands 1 Hungary 2. I also noticed that Ruud boy van Nistelrooy was the lone striker on the pitch. That made me fear for the worst.
I thought that rVp had suffered another Chiellini moment but after surfing the net I found out that he was replaced at halftime after scoring on the 13th minute. At least his bones were intact.
The Dutch got their equalizer from Boy Genius Wesley. He had a fortunate one-two with some Hungarian bloke before slotting the ball sweetly past Fulop. That one-two was a quick reminder about the one-two Silvestre did with that little Wizard. Mr. Dick Stamina was shown with a swollen eye but that ox kept on playing. BarcAlien newbie Afellay tracked back to win the ball close to the corner flag. He then went on an amazing run, skinned many blokes before sending a lovely crossfield ball to Mr. Dick Stamina. Kuyt controlled the ball then squared it to Ruud boy who wasted no time in finishing the ball with a first time shot. That was his 35th goal in his 70 appearance for the Oranje.
That meant that he had joined the Monsieur 50/50 club that is headed by Juninho Pernambucano. There’s a legend which says that the bearded Brazilian scored a goal in every 2 free kicks he played. Fool-ham’s Gera scored an emphatic finish to level the tie at 3-3 but Mr. Dick Stamina turned on the screw with 2 brilliant late goals.
Wait……this is an Arsenal blog not some Dutch football article. Bleeeeh.
Mr. Dick Stamina’s first was a technically accurate finish from a neat cross by Afellay but his second was more or less a classy fluke because he chipped the goalie from quite some distance even though the ball was meant for Ruud boy.
Mr. Dick Stamina was denied any chance of a hattrick when he was replaced by a Mohican. There was even time for the cameramen to show the fans Dutch legends like Frankie Rijkaaie Frankie and Marco van Bastard.
When the thrilling encounter was over, I tuned to the channel that showed the England-Ghana game. Wilshere was replaced by the exciting winger Matt Jarvis. The Flour Mill-ner hacked down 33AsaGyan deliberately from behind but he received a yellow when I expected red. There was a lot of ceremony before the free kick but 33AsaGyan killed a bird with the resulting free kick. There was even time to introduce Ghanaian-born Welbeck but 33AsaGyan got what his persistence deserved by scoring the equalizer right on the death. He made Ghanaian mince meat out of that Man City defender that was struck by Lord Voldemort when he was young, opened himself up then placed the ball with his left foot.
Arshavin’s Motherland Russia went to the Middle East to play World Cup 2022 hosts Qatar with the weather having the same boiling point with water, 100oC. They scored first and hit Akinfeev’s bar 1 million times but AA23 gave an assist to Twitch FC’s Pavlychenchenchenko whose finish leveled the tie at 1-1.
In the city of Prague, Czech captain TR7 was pulling all the g-strings in midfield in the game against Lichtenstein. Czech Republic got off to a flyer when TR7 gave an assist to Sami Khedira who finished with style. I meant Milan Baros.
Wald Bezt B52 played for the Danes n their 2-1 friendly win over Slovakia.
All Arsenal players involved in international duty tonight didn’t have their fingers cut from ceiling fans. Thank Heavens.
There was a time when I believed that Wenger would never go back to his vomit in terms of re-signing players that have left the club.
Sol Campbell trained with the club, we re-signed him; David Beckham trained with the club, we let him go (duh); Thierry Henry trained with the club, he went back; Mad Jens trained with the club, we re-signed him. Out of the blue comes former gunner reject Jeremie Aliadiere.
Since a club like Middlesbrough could still release his ass after all the goals he scored for them against us, you’ll tend to wonder about the cruelties that come with football. He told the media Vultures that he’s confident that AW the Alchemist will re-sign him IF he decided that Arsenal needs another striker.
It’s always good to dream the dream once in a while but I don’t see Mr. Ali wearing the Arsenal jersey anytime soon. We know that he’s French but his services are not needed in a club like Arsenal. We should remember that Wald Bezt B52 cries once in a while, we also have an Aztec Warrior that’s currently plying his trade in WBA.
Aliadiere was the lone striker when Neil Banfield’s reserves played against WigWig. There was no way I could watch the game so I followed the events of the game through Twitter.
This game was Aliadere’s first game in 8 months so he was the R in rusty. Miquel got a red card in the 20th minute for a professional foul even though it seemed as if Daniel Boateng was on the same line with the Arsenal reserves captain. The stadium was typically quiet but Mad Jens kept shouting at players that were less than half his age.
Mad Jens had to contend with a lot of crosses from the flanks and tricky back passes from the defense. In the 36th minute, Mad Jens produced a super save that rolled back the years. This tweet will explain it better.
“@YoungGunsBlog: Superb save from Lehmann to deny Rugg again. Only a YARD out, but the 41-year old showed great reactions to keep it out”
On his day, Mad Jens can be very exceptional but he’s also very eccentric. If AW the Alchemist was delighted for seeing that super save, the next “act” by Mad Jens would have been the Scene 1 Act 1 for the movie: Jens Lehmann mojo series.
Let me write it down in the exact way I got it from a column.
“As the half appeared to be petering out, a hair-raising moment for Lehmann and Arsenal nearly resulted in a freak goal for the hosts. There seemed no danger when Hajrovic rolled a tame back-pass Lehmann’s way and, just like Paul Robinson did that time in Croatia, he missed his kick after the ball took a horrible bobble. The whole ground gasped as, seemingly in slow motion, the ball trickled goalwards. Thankfully for Lehmann, it would roll inches, make that centimetres, wide of the right post.”
Mad Jens Lehmann, eccentricity at its best.
WigWig opened the scoring in the 53rd minute from a bloke that shares the same name with Liverpool legend McManaman. It was a simple close range finish that Lehmann could do nothing about.
Mad Jens was caught in the middle of nowhere when Wigan built up another nice attack. Boateng cleared the ball off the line to spare Lehmann’s blushes.
With 7 minutes left to play, a Wigan youngling that shares the name with construction company John Holt put the game beyond doubt by dribbling Mad Jens when he was one-on-one to play the ball into an empty net. His first name is Joe not John.
Arsneal’s Rhys Murphy converted a spot kick in the 90th minute but it was too little too late for the Reserve Gunners as the game ended in a defeat that brings Arsenal Reserve League title hopes to an end. That’s not surprising. The Arsenal Reserves can’t win the title, the Arsenal first team is still hopeful for the title while the Arsenal Ladies…….
From what you’ve read above will you start Mad Jens against Blackburn? Dunno about you, but I’ll stick to the Devil I know.
In other news, Arsenal has opened an academy in ancient Greece. There we will train the descendants of Leonidas, Odysseus, Agamemnon, Hector and Achilles. The name Achilles doesn’t bring any fond memories because it’s holding our star defender captive.
The section of the media Vulture association known as the daily mail say that we want Germany’s shot stopper Manuel Neuer. Even if I know how good he is, the name Manuel isn’t in our good books right now.
England U-21 manager Stuart Pearce says that he’s taking the Whizkhid to Scandinavia in the summer for the European U-21 Championships. I guess that there’s nothing we can do about it but we could try and ask Chelsea’s Nneka the Bald what he told the arsecrater Domenech. That way Wilshere can say the same thing to Pearce, book his early ticket back to London, get an 18-match ban from the U-21’s then officially retire as an Under 21 player.
I don’t know if I’ll describe this write up as Tuesday’s late post or Wednesday’s early post. The bottom line is that the next post will come on Thursday.
I’ll end today’s post with a factual tweet about the Arsenal.
“@AAllenSport: Arsenal vs Blackburn is the last time the Gunners will play on a Saturday this season. (9 games left: 1 on Saturday, 7 on Sunday and 1 on Wednesday”
This means that gooners in Abuja can come to Silverbird Cinemas to watch a movie or two on Saturdays without having our dear ol’ Arsenal in mind.
While you at it, feel free to buy a thing or two at Anan World. It’s on the ground floor.
Ensure that you keep your fingers away from ceiling fans, it hurts like Hell.