A week begins in earnest with †нє first of many big clashes in †нє Premier League. †нє highly anticipated clash between †нє Gunners and †нє Red Hell Owners takes place tonight.

†нє Cashlings dropped 2 more points against Twitch FC yesterday. All thanks must go to †нє Drog Man. It was nice seeing him miss that penalty. Even †нє Lampback of Notre Dame’s introduction didn’t really have impact on †нє game.

Tonight’s game is a match football lovers around the globe can’t afford to miss. †нє encounters between †нє two major Premier League title winners have brought nail biting moments and great entertainment for †нє neutrals.

†нє time for cheap shots and low blows are over. †нє talking will be done for 90 minutes plus added time. I would expect a game of this magnitude to have up to 5 minutes of added time….besides †нє Red Hell Owners are renowned for their P.D.P. ability when it comes to added time.

Our record against them in recent times has been below-par, but †нє 2010/11 has produced †нє largest amount of topsy-turvy games in Premier League. Take a good look at †нє Cashlings, they were eating teams like wafers last season but they haven’t recorded a win in 8 games in all competitions. Or MadMan Coyle’s Nomads who were long ball specialists under Gary Megson but now they play a bit like us with †нє ball on †нє ground and currently occupy 6th place. I’m not going to comment about Twitch FC or †нє Cash Money Oil Money Billionaires but †нє bottomline is that scripts have been torn and record books have been rewritten.

This clash is really mouthwatering because of †нє position on both sides of †нє form table….they have †нє best home record, we have †нє best away record.

A draw might be a favourable result for both clubs but a victory will send out a clear message to those below us in Mount Premiership that †нє 6-year Premier League wait may be over this season. A win will also send us 4 points clear of our title rivals. Let’s not also forget that they have a date with †нє Cashlings next week and †нє U.S.S.R. dictator may just place an ultimatum on Carlo †нє Cannibal. We should not also forget that their postponed game against †нє Fruities will not be a walk over. †нє obstinate Fruities have been †нє surprise package with a series of major upsets, †нє most notable being †нє win against Count Hodgson’s Vampires in †нєir own Anfield Transylvania.

Going to team news, †нє 1st major change in †нє squad will be introduction of Wojciech “Szszszszsz” Szszceny to take his preferred position between †нє sticks. AW started this season with 4 goalies. Manuel “Stainless Steel” Almunia went down †нє pecking order after his horror movie against WBA. This season also saw Szszszsz usurp Vito “Don Vittorio” Mannone as †нє 3rd choice goalie. Stainless Steel’s likely departure in January would mean that our goal post will belong to †нє Poles. Its time to juxtapose between Szszszsz and Don Vittorio. Don Vittorio has played 9 games for us….Arsenal lost none. He intends to make his Hull switch permanent. As for Szszsz….

RT @53Szczesny53: “Some of you have asked if I ever conceded a goal for Arsenal 1st team. Well… No!! 3 games – 3 clean sheets”.

From his own Twitter account. Please I could do with a 4th clean sheet tonight.

AW has to find †нє centreback pairing that will shove off †нє threat of RooThug and Berbatinho. Its obvious that Sebastien “Squisha” Squilacci will start because of his experience and French descent. His partnership with Johan “Injourou” Djourou has been quite solid. Injourou handles aerial balls very well, but †нє Red Hell Owners put †нє ball on †нє ground like us so I will prefer Laurent “Kos100%tackle” to get †нє nod. Bacary “Timaya” Sagna will retain his place at right back, †нє bloody red card he received on Wednesday has no effect here. A slight cause for concern will be Gael “Flash” Clichy, †нє player he will be up against Luis “Yar Adua” Nani who has †нє highest amount of assists in †нє Premier League this season. One lapse in concentration and we are done for. Let’s simply hope that †нє Self Destruct Remote Control is dead and gone. Alexandre “Sabinus” Song should remember that he’s a defensive holding midfielder today. Andrei “Hotty” Arshavin will get †нє nod against Theo “Wal Kuint” Walcott, he should better justify AW’s faith this time. I’m okay with Wal Kuint on †нє bench, he can come in and run †нє French Cuntling down after El-Rufai has dealt with him. I also expect Robin “glassboned” van Persie to start ahead of Marouane “ChiAmaka” Chamakh. This is †нє kind of game you score one goal with one chance and I believe RvP in situations like this.

So my expected line-up is

Szszszsz
Flash-Squisha-Kos100%tackle-Timaya
Whizkhid-Sabinus
El Capitan
Hotty-glassboned vP-El-Rufai

†нє Red Hell Owners have won 7 of their 8 home games this season. With 24 scored and 6 conceded.

Their Bulgazilian Berbatinho has scored 11 goals there.

To win tonight, we need focus and concentration from start to finish.

He said that we are a mere training centre but this training centre has produced numerous World Cup winners like Igwe, Pires, Vieira and European Championship winners like Fabregas, Wiltord et al.

He also forgot that †нє training center produced 2 World Cup finalists…while †нє best his teammates could do was to enter †нє round of 16. That player just joined him recently while he crashed out with his country in †нє first hurdle. He even lost to Vuvuzela FC.

Play time is over, its time to show †нє world why we are seating on †нє top of Mount Premiership.

A draw won’t be †нє end of †нє world but a win will show our title challenging intent.

Enjoy England’s El Classico wherever you are in †нє world.

Here’s to a Patrice Evra’s own goal.

Happy table topping Monday