Back in †нє Hunt and defensive signing still needed

In †нє 2003/04 season, a set of players achieved what Preston North End did in †нє pre-historic era. Complete a whole season without losing a game. They got into †нє 2004/05 season with †нє same confidence. In †нє 50th game at Old Strafford, †нє record was finally broken courtesy of two goals from †нє RooThug and Choi Yun-Park. This set of players played 49 games without tasting defeat. That feat earned them †нє name, “†нє Invincibles”.

This season, our fierce rivals, †нє Red Hell Owners want to follow our footsteps to be †нє “second” team to finish a season unbeaten in Premier League history. We all hoped that Twitch FC would be †нє team to hand them their maiden loss of †нє 2010/11 season but as always, Twitch FC can’t be trusted. †нє only positive note however is that †нє Red Hell Owners have dropped two valuable points. Everybody says that they have two games in hand but we are forgetting that †нє games in hand are not sitters.

†нє first game is against †нє Fruities in Bloomfield Road. We all know how stubborn that lot can be. †нє second game in hand is a trip to †нє Blue Bridge to face †нє Cashlings. It seems as if †нє Cashlings have gotten their mojo back so that’ll be a tricky tie for †нє Red Hell Owners.

After week 23, we are two points off with our own game in hand against †нє Red Striped Rugby boys. At least we can say that,”we are back in †нє Hunt”.

We all know †нє center back situation in Arsenal FC. Thomas “Verminator” Vermaelen and Sebastien “Squisha” Squillaci are out with Achilles tendon and hamstring injuries respectively. AW †нє Alchemist has been coy in his approach for a new center back.

†нє media Vultures have linked us with four defenders: Mertebeanstalk, †нє Beastly One, Up Up Matty and Gary †нє Nomad.

Gooner Daily is going to review these players and comment on their chances of wearing †нє Red and White this January.

Mertebeanstalk is known in †нє real World as Per Mertesacker. He was born on 29.09.84. He’s almost 2 meters tall……1.98 meters to be exact. His key attributes are his height, composure, positioning and aerial ability. He said openly that he wants to concentrate on his football in Werder Bremen so †нє chances of getting him are low. Gooner Daily Arsenal chance rating: 3/10

†нє Beastly One is known to †нє real World as Christopher Veijeany Samba. He was born on 28.03.84. He’s 1.93 meters tall. His key attributes are his height, aerial ability, strength, aggression, bravery and of course his “ugliness”. Most strikers get scared when he comes to mark them. He has indicated that he wants a new challenge and will definitely jump at †нє chance to wear †нє Red and White. Gooner Daily Arsenal chance rating: 8/10

Up Up Matty is known to †нє real World as Matthew Upson. He was born on 18.04.79. He’s 1.85 meters tall. His key attributes are…….

Gooner Daily can’t think of any. All i can say is that he’s an old chap with Premier League experience. He also has some Arsenal Red and White blood cells in his body because we was our employee from ’97 to 2002. I used to think that AW †нє Alchemist will never go back to his “vomit” but †нє re-signing of Big Sol proved otherwise. Up Up Matty’s contract is due to expire this summer and i don’t think he has plans of plying his trade in †нє npower Championship. All he needs is a whisper from AW †нє Alchemist and he’ll abandon †нє Carpenters sinking ship without thinking twice. Gooner Daily Arsenal chance rating: 9/10 ….really scary

Gary †нє Nomad is also known as Gary Cahill. He was born on 19.12.85. He’s 1.88 meters tall. His key attributes are his age, †нє fact that he’s “English”, his heading ability and his good technique on †нє ball. With †нє emerging tales that MadMan Coyle’s Nomads are in debt he may want to cash-in on Gary †нє Nomad. †нє major problem is that †нє fact that Gary †нє Nomad is English. This means that he’ll be available for an exorbitant fee. Let’s face it, crappy English players fetch amazing transfer prices. One-Dimensional Flour Mill-ner cost †нє CMOM billionaires £30m, Short Wright-Phillips cost †нє Cashlings £21m. Even †нє Scarred Joleon cost £24m. Gooner Daily Arsenal chance rating: 2/10.

It’s imminent that we sign a defender because Johan “Injourou” Djourou and Laurent “Kos100%tackle” Koscielny can’t be playing week in, week out when we know fully well that we are still in †нє “quad”.

Let’s keep our fingers crossed for that unknown defender from Krypton.

†нє trip to Elland Road is around †нє corner.

That’s all for now.


About enigma106

An Arsenal fan with a good sense of humor

Posted on January 17, 2011, in Transfer Gossip. Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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