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Rumours and defensive reshaping needed

AW the Alchemist is at it again. He has gone to enemy BarcAlien territory to legitimately snatch a youngling from their Mutant Academy. The youngling goes by the name
Jon Miquel Toral Harper. His mama is English I presume.

There are reports that the BarcAlien president Sandro Rosell isn’t happy about the signing. The driving force of his newly found anger is that he couldn’t afford our captain. If he’s angry he can feel free to f*ck himself. I don’t give a pig’s snout.

We all know that a replay against Leyton Orient will take place after our Carling Spoon final.

That bald Tehoue bloke put his name in the headlines by scoring that goal. That match saw Ignasi Miquel get his Arsenal debut.

Even though him and Gibbsy where put in a trance by that baldy’s magic trick, Miquel has told AW the Alchemist that he wants “another chance”.

The tall center back has been at the club since 2008 after signing from a Spanish outfit called Cornelia.

With Verm suffering another setback, it’s high time AW the Alchemist makes Miquel’s promotion to the first team permanent. Besides AW the Alchemist is renowned for giving chances to younglings at the club. If he could hand youngling Movie superstar Tom Cruise a debut against Olympiakos in Athens, I believe that Miquel should be given a chance to stake his claim for a place in the team. Koscielny is out with a back problem so Djourou will be in need of a new partner. It’s up to AW the Alchemist to decide whether its the Squisha or young Miquel.

AW the Alchemist says that the draw against Leyton was creditable to them because of their refusal to give despite conceding to a player that hasn’t scored since the time Merlin was the chief sorcerer in Britain.

He says that the Lower league teams have become stronger. Song believes that we have what it takes to win the replay.

Of course we do. We are the Arsenal. It’s just painful that we have to go through the rigorous process of playing an extra game. If I’m AW the Alchemist, I’ll play the same 11 that drew at Brisbane Road. I wouldn’t make substitutions too. Let’s just call it “footballing punishment”.

There are also reports that our man on fire, rVp has a small hamstring problem so he’s gonna miss the encounter against the Rugby boys tomorrow.

After reading that piece of info I opened my Twitter app on my BlackBerry to check a few tweets. This tweet explains the next line of action.

“@OleGunner: Whoever starts in place of RVP has to do the same thing he does. Nothing radical. Just, control the ball with 4ward momentum & take shots”

It’s that simple. rVp gets the ball, links up play and shoots a whole lot of balls. 10 balls found the back of the net in January/February. The only player that will be capable of achieving replicating rVp’s brilliance will be Nicklas Bendtner.

I know that he killed many rabbits at Brisbane Road but he still has it in him. I hope he does well if selected ahead of Chamakh tomorrow.

Diaby serves his last match ban tomorrow but it seems as if he has picked up a calf strain. That’s new…..getting injured while suspended.

The media Vultures are really good in cooking up some outrageous headlines.

“Arsenal Playmaker Samir Nasri Set for £35m Barcelona Move If Gunners Win Title”

Bullocks.

Nasri’s contract is due to expire at the end of next season but AW the Alchemist says that a deal will be reached in the summer. The idea of signing a new contract isn’t rocket science. In Football Manager ™ , all you have to do is to click on the “offer new contract” icon and everything becomes done and dusted. Besides, it’s the players agent that does the bulk of the work.

Unlike some websites, Nasri doesn’t have to read the “terms and conditions” of the contract. All he needs to see that part that shows £xxx,xxx then the _____ part on the right hand side.

As for Barcelona, we know that they are a broke-ass lot. I firmly believe that Nasri will be a gunner for as long as he pleases.

More on the Stoke game tomorrow.

The tweet of the day goes to @ZynAFC

“@ZynAFC: Expect Torres to shine tonight, he’s more of a European cunt than a PL cunt. (I don’t really think he’s a cunt)”

I don’t think he’s a cunt though. He’s just an overpriced player whose user manual is still missing.

Sayonara